Quebec’s new Premier Couillard to be investigated by APEGA

CALGARY, Alberta – Quebec’s new premier, Philippe Couillard, may be in for a harsh ride after his acceptance speech given on Tuesday.  Referencing tectonics in his speech, he was quoted as saying, “… shifting political views in Quebec on a tectonic scale.”

Mark Lelongshapht, a geologist in Calgary, heard the speech on television and promptly called his local APEGA delegate.

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Mark Lelongshapht, upset geologist

I called right away and, boy, was I pissed off. We can’t have just any one talking about tectonics, especially in such a precarious way.  What if someone thought the Quebec political race was effecting earthquakes and the movement of Earth’s core?  Only qualified and registered professionals should talk about such serious topics, not everyday neurosurgeons turned politicians. Sheesh. – Mark Lelongshapht, P.Geo.

A team from the Internal Audit Committee at APEGA was tasked with fully investigating Dr. Couillard for his off-hand reference.  The investigation will cover whether or not Couillard intended to act in a geological manner; whether or not he acted with knowledge of the topic at hand without being a registered member, or if he had any knowledge of APEGA or what they could do to him for pretending.

Julie Shafter, the lead investigator on the team, had this to say at the Calgary Airport on her way to Quebec:

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Julie Shafter, engineer

We will find out if this guy is just stupid or if he really wants to be a geologist.  HE should have known better.  We are getting no cooperation from the professional association in Quebec, as they only speak french.  We could not find a translator to help us out here in Calgary, which isn’t a surprise as most people who put the effort into learning french don’t have time for math or science, and aren’t likely one of our members.

We’ll report back with the conclusion of our investigation within 9 days.  At that point we will know if APEGA is going to pursue legal action against Premier Couillard. – Julie Shafter, P.Eng., Chief of Investigative Engineering

Local francophones are outraged by APEGA’s lateral move into politics, citing Couillard’s remark as a simple analogy to the political movement in Quebec.  Rational as that may be, it seems that APEGA has geared up to do whatever they can to ensure geological professionalism is maintained (for once), including a possible surprise visit by its somewhat newly formed EGP-SWAT Team.